July 7th, 2016
There are more words in me than patience to deliver their truth.
So what shall I do?
What shall I say when all I have are words to cradle yet another name another body slain in cold blood.
We speak their names
[Alton Stirling]
in desperate pleas to just live
[Sandra Bland]
in this skin. Modern day lynchings of my people
[Tamir Rice]
haunt me daily as I fight to just be
[Eric Garner]
I am faced with more doubt in this life
[Rakia Boyd]
trying to live and be free in this place
[Philando Castille]
that would rather not have me here. I hear them often
[Amadou Diallo]
and attempt to move forward although who I am causes me set backs, I set "black" on the table before me alongside each label
declaring I will survive in all that has been left for me to feast on.
Yet the taste of this meal has long since lost its flavor.
Strange fruit has never been appetizing and even harder to swallow every time we are force fed irrelevant justification.
The expectation is clear:
"say nothing so it won't happen you.
Don't be too black. Stay in a woman's place.
Don't be gay period.
Learn enough to get by knowing that even a portion of your knowledge they would literally kill for. Don't you dare speak up
[angry black woman]
and challenge this system that was never designed for you.
Sit back and take notes little black girl this world does not belong to you nor your kind.
In time, your frustration will blow over and you'll forget them...
the ones we've slaughtered in honor of the constitution of this great land in which you were never a thought."
My God I was birthed into this problem.
What shall I do?
How do I act on change when chains weigh me and media attempts to sway me into believing black lives matter
but they only matter to those who care
but who cares as long as I punch in on time making sure massa meets his bottom line.
My crime has been caring too much and not saying enough
but what exactly should I say when I can't even find a reason for these words to justify my skin being treason
and who I love automatically makes me seasonal target practice for mass re-enactments of legal bullying and systematic oppression
pulling at my educated black mind
just trying to be counted and make a dime in this human race
I don't mean to sound like I am giving up
but I can't keep up with this pace of extermination.
God I just need to know how
so please accept this as a fed up response of my humanness we need You now.
I need You so that I can truly
TALK BACK!
Taryn "LoveReigns" Wharwood 2017
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